Someone Else’s Story – Chess

MERANO

CITIZENS OF MERANO

O light the heart

That lingers in Merano

Merano! The spa no

Connoisseur of spas would miss

So healthy

Highly recommended

Is this sweet metropolis

Mental and physical bliss!

The gods have smiled

And bless-ed is Merano

Merano! There are no

Fitter burghers to be found

Such vigor!

Take the time to taste us

We’ll give you a welcome that’s typically Tirol

For then we are sure of our ground

Right now we’re Italian–we used to be German

The border keeps shifting around

MAYOR

Speaking as one the patriarchs

I don’t mind taking your lira or marks

CITIZENS

Oh I get high when I saunter by the mountains of Merano

Rosy-cheeked Merano!

Flourishing to a fault

The sparkling streams, the bracing air

The therapeutic salt

I’d have to be carried away to call a halt

Oh I feel great in this bouncing state o hail to thee Merano

Hearty hale Merano

Any objections? Nein!

Where breathing in will turn you on

Where water tastes like wine

Get out your get up and go and get in line

It’s living your life in a show by Rodgers and Hammerstein

O sad the soul

Who passes by Merano

Merano! so far no

Soul has ever passed us by

They love us

Why not stay forever?

Oh so many reasons why

All those in favor say “Aye”

Aye!

So sing a song

Let’s hera it for Merano

Merano! Soprano

Alto, tenor, bass agree

We’re wholesome

What a happy haven

This is the place where your arteries soften

Cholesterol hasn’t a chance

From mountain to valley the natural goodness

Is fighting pollution’s advance

MAYOR

So come to us and feel the force

All major credit cards taken of course

Oh I get high when I saunter by the mountains of Merano

Rosy-cheeked Merano

Flourishing to a fault

The sparkling streams, the bracing air,BR>

The therapeutic salt

I’d have to be carried away to call a halt!

Once in a while all the gods will smile on little old Merano

Humble shy Merano

Suddenly hits the press

And I report with all the pride

And joy that I possess

Half of the world and his wife has our address

Our little town will be rife with games of chess!

CITIZENS (after a good whistle)

Get out your get up and go and get in line

It’s living your life in a show…

THE AMERICAN

What a scene! What a joy!

What a lovely sight

When my game is the big sensation!

Has the mob’s sporting taste

Altered overnight?

Have they found new sophistication?

Not yet! They just want to see

If the nice guy beats the bum

If it’s East-West

And the money’s sky-high

They all come

You can raise all you want

If you raise the roof

Scream and shout and the gate increases

Break the rules–break the bank

I’m the living proof

They don’t care how I move my pieces

I know I’m the best there is

But all they want is a show

Well that’s all right–I’ll be glad to oblige

S.R.O., S.R.O.

He disappears. The MAYOR and CITIZENS resume their song.

MAYOR AND CITIZENS

Oh I get high when I saunter by the mountains of Merano

Rosy-cheeked Merano

Flourishing to a fault

The sparkling streams the bracing air

The therapeutic salt

I’d have to be carried away to call a halt

Oh I feel great in this bouncing state o hail to thee Merano

Hearty hale Merano

Any objections? Nein!

Where breathing in will turn you on where water tastes like wine

Get up your get up and go and get in line

It’s living your life in a show by Rodgers and Hammerstein!

Now for the sell

We put the ice into paradise, we are the salt of the earth

Sound as a bell

Check out the water

And check out the hygiene at which we excel

Check into a hotel

And schnell

Body and soul

Get well!

THE RUSSIAN AND MOLOKOV/WHERE I WANT TO BE

MOLOKOV

The man is utterly mad–you’re playing a lunatic–(he switches TV off)

THE RUSSIAN

That’s the problem. He’s a brilliant lunatic and you can’t tell which way he’ll jump —

like his game he’s impossible to analyze–you can’t dissect him, predict him,

which of course means he’s not a lunatic at all.

MOLOKOV

What we’ve just seen’s a pathetic display

From a man who’s beginning to crack

He’s afraid

He knows he isn’t the player he was

And he won’t get it back

THE RUSSIAN

Nonsense!

Why do my seconds

Always want to believe

Third-rate propaganda–

MOLOKOV

My friend, please relax

We’re all on your side

You know how you need us–

THE RUSSIAN

I don’t need my army of so-called ‘advisors’

And helpers to tell me

The man who’s revitalized chess single-handed

Is more or less out of his brain

When it’s very clear

He’s sane

MOLOKOV

Listen, we don’t underestimate anyone

We won’t get caught in that trap

After all, winning or losing reflects on us all–

THE RUSSIAN

Oh don’t give me that crap!

I win–no one else does

And I take the rap if I lose

MOLOKOV

It’s not quite that simple

The whole world’s tuned in

We’re all on display

We’re not merely sportsmen

THE RUSSIAN

Oh please don’t start spouting that old party line

Yes I know it’s your job but

Just get out and get me a chess-playing second

In thirty-six hours we begin

That is if you want to win!

MOLOKOV leaves, annoyed. THE RUSSIAN is alone. He wanders over to a chess board and moves some pieces.

Who needs a dream?

Who needs ambition?

Who’d be the fool

In my position?

Once I had dreams

Now they’re the obsessions

Hopes became needs

Lovers possessions

Then they move in

Oh so discreetly.

Slowly at first,

Smiling too sweetly.

I opened doors.

They walked right through them.

Called me their friend.

I hardly knew them.

Now I’m where I want to be and who I want to be

And doing what I always said I would

And yet I feel I haven’t won at all.

Running for my life and never looking back

In case there’s someone right behind to shoot me down

And say he always knew I’d fall.

When the crazy wheel slows down

Where will I be? Back where I started.

Don’t get me wrong,

I’m not complaining.

Times have been good,

Fast, entertaining.

But what’s the point

When I’m concealing

Most of my thoughts

All of my feeling.

Now I’m where I want to be and who I want to be

And doing what I always said I would

And yet I feel I haven’t won at all.

Running for my life and never looking back

In case there’s someone right behind to shoot me down

And say he always knew I’d fall.

When the crazy wheel slows down

Where will I be? Back where I started.

THE OPENING CEREMONY

ARBITER

I’ve a duty as the referee

At the start of the match

On behalf of all our sponsors

I must welcome you

Which I do–there’s a catch

I don’t care if your a champion

No one messes with me

I am ruthless in upholding

What I know is right

Black or white–as you’ll see

I’m on the case

Can’t be fooled

Any objection

Is overruled

Yes I’m the Arbiter and I know best

CHORUS

He’s impartial, don’t push him, he’s unimpressed

ARBITER

You’ve got your tricks

Good for you

But there’s no gambit I don’t see through

Oh I’m the Arbiter I know the score

CHORUS

From square one he’ll be watching all 64

ARBITER

If you’re thinking of the kind of thing

That we’ve seen in the past

Chanting gurus, walkie-talkies

Walkouts, hypnotists,

Tempers, fists–not so fast

This is not the start of World War Three

No political ploys

I think both your constitutions are terrific so

Now you know–be good boys

I’m on the case

Can’t be fooled

Any objection

Is overruled

Yes I’m the Arbiter and I know best

CHORUS

He’s impartial, don’t push him he’s unimpressed

ARBITER

You’ve got your tricks

Good for you

But there’s no gambit I don’t see through

Oh I’m the Arbiter I know the score

CHORUS

From square one he’ll be watching all 64

ARBITER

Yes I’m the Arbiter I know the score

CHORUS

From square one he’s watching all 64

MOLOKOV AND DIPLOMATS

No one can deny that these are difficult times…

It’s the US versus USSR

Yet we more or less are —

No one can deny that these are difficult times…

–to our credit putting all that aside

We have swallowed our pride

These are very dangerous and difficult times…

It really doesn’t matter who comes out on top, who gets the chop

No one’s way of life is threatened by a flop–

But we’re gonna smash their bastard

Make him wanna change his name

Take him to the cleaners and devastate him

Wipe him out, humiliate him

We don’t want the whole world saying

They can’t even win a game

We have never reckoned

On coming second

There’s no use in losing

It’s the US versus USSR

Yet we more or less are–

No one can deny that these are difficult times…

–to our credit putting all that aside

We have swallowed our pride

These are very dangerous and difficult times…

The value of events like this need not be stressed

When East and West

Can meet as comrades, ease the tension over drinks

Through sporting links

As long as their man sinks

MERCHANDISERS

Whether you are pro or anti

Or could not care less

We are here to tell you

We are here to sell you chess

Not a chance of you escaping from our wiles

We’ve locked the doors, we’ve blocked the aisles

We’ve a franchise worth exploiting

And we will–yes we will!

When it comes to merchandising

We could kill

When you get up–

When you get up in the morning

Till you crash at night

You will have to live your life

With bishop, rook, and knight

Clean your teeth with checkered toothpaste

Wear our vests

Our kings and queens on bouncing breasts

You could even buy a set

And learn to play

We don’t mind we’ll sell you something

Anyway

We’ve done all our market research

And our findings show

That this game of chess could be around

A month or so

Maybe it’s a bit confusing

For a game

But Rubik’s Cubes were much the same

In the end the whole world bought one

All were gone

By which time we merchandisers

Had moved on

By which time we had moved on!

ARBITER

I’m on the case, can’t be fooled

Any objection is overruled

Don’t try to tempt me–you’ve no hope

I don’t like women, I don’t take dope

I’m the Arbiter I know the score

CHORUS

From square one he’ll be watching all 64

ARBITER

You’ve got your tricks

Good for you

But there’s no gambit I don’t see through

I’m the Arbiter and I know best

CHORUS

He’s impartial, don’t push him, he’s unimpressed

ARBITER

I’m the Arbiter my word is law

CHORUS

From square one he’ll be watching you…

EVERYONE (except players and seconds)

Don’t you find it rather touching to behold

The game that came in from the cold

Seen for what it is–religion, plus finesse

Countries, classes, creeds, as one in

Love of chess

QUARTET (A Model of Decorum and Tranquility)

MOLOKOV

We wish, no must, make our disgust at this abuse perfectly clear

We’re here for chess. Are the US? If so, why foul the atmosphere?

FLORENCE

I must protest–our delegation has a host of valid points to raise

Our player’s sporting attitude’s beyond all praise

As any neutral would attest

But we concede the fact his masters bend the rules is not a player’s fault–

We’ll overlook their crude political assault and under protest will proceed

MOLOKOV (simultaneously with FLORENCE’s speech above)

We wish, no must, make our disgust at this abuse perfectly clear

We’re here for chess. Are the US? How can you make such a claim?

MOLOKOV

ARBITER

If your man’s so sweet

Then why his fighting talk?

If he’s not a cheat

Then why on earth

Did he go take a walk?

Point 17

No one-way screen

Will be allowed

In the hall

FLORENCE

Why let him loose?

He’ll soon reduce

This great event

To a brawl

It’s very sad

To see the ancient and

Distinguished game

That used to be

I am not suprised

He wanted fresher air

Once he realized

There was no hope

Of your lot playing fair

How sad

To see

What used

To be

BOTH

A model of decorum and tranquility

Become like any other sport

A battleground for rival ideologies

To slug it out with glee

THE RUSSIAN

MOLOKOV

Through the elegant yelling

Of this compelling dispute

Comes the ghastly suspicion

My opposition’s a fruit

We wish, no must, make our disgust

At this abuse perfectly clear

We’re here for chess. Are the US?

If so, why foul the atmosphere?

FLORENCE

I don’t suppose

You understand the strain and pressure

Getting where he’s got

For then you’d simply call him

Highly strung and not

Imply that he was one of those

ARBITER

Point 23

The board will be

Made in Sweden

Non-aligned wood

THE RUSSIAN

MOLOKOV

But how can you

Work for one who

Treats you like dirt?

Pay must be good

FLORENCE

I’m not getting rich

My only interest

Is in something which

Gives me the chance

Of working with the best

It seems to us

There’s little point in waiting here

All night for his return

And since a peaceful match

Is our sole concern

We won’t make an official fuss

In short we rise

Above your guy’s

Tantrums, dramas,

Dirty tricks

THE RUSSIAN

ARBITER

I can only say

I hope your dream comes true

Till that far-off day

I hope you cope

With helping number two

Point 31

No game begun

By noon goes on

After six

THE RUSSIAN AND FLORENCE

ARBITER AND MOLOKOV

How sad

To see

It’s very sad

To see the ancient

And distinguished game

That used to be

ALL

A model of decorum and tranquility

Become like any other sport

A battleground for rival ideologies

To slug it out with glee

THE AMERICAN AND FLORENCE/NOBODY’S SIDE

FLORENCE

You want to lose your only friend?

Well keep it up, you’re doing fine

Why this humiliation?

Why treat me like a fool?

I’ve taken shit for seven years

And I won’t take it anymore.

THE AMERICAN

I’m only teasing Soviets

With gentle bonhomie

And you’ve a better reason to be anti-them than me

FLORENCE

There’s a time and there’s a place.

THE AMERICAN

Is this the girl always said

She wants to know the truth?

FLORENCE

There’s a time and there’s a place…

CHOIR (In background throughout entire sequence)

1956–Budapest is rising

1956–Budapest is fighting

1956–Budapest is falling

1956–Budapest is dying

THE AMERICAN

I’d have thought you’d support

Any attack on these people

On the people who ran

Mindlessly over your childhood

Don’t let them fool you for

Thirty years on they’re the same

They see chess as a war

Playing with pawns just like Poland

If you walk out on me

They will have won the first battle

Wouldn’t your father

Have begged you to stay in the game?

FLORENCE

He would–but he didn’t know you

He’d loathe your behavior and so do I–

Why’d you have to do this to me?

What’s going on around me

Is barely making sense

I need some explanations fast.

I see my present partner

In the imperfect tense

And I don’t see how we can last

I feel I need a change of cast

Maybe I’m on nobody’s side.

And when he gives me reasons

To justify each move

They’re getting harder to believe

I know this can’t continue

I’ve still a lot to prove

There must be more I could achieve

But I don’t have the nerve to leave.

Everybody’s playin’ the game

but nobody’s rules are the same

Nobody’s on nobody’s side

Better learn to go it alone

Recognize you’re out on your own

Nobody’s on nobody’s side.

The one I should not think of

Keeps rolling through my mind

And I don’t want to let that go

No lovers ever faithful

No contract truly signed

There’s nothing certain left to know

And how the cracks begin to show!

Never make a promise or plan

Take a little love where you can

Nobody’s on nobody’s side

Never stay too long in your bed

Never lose your heart, use your head

Nobody’s on nobody’s side.

Never take a stranger’s advice

Never let a friend fool you twice

Nobody’s on nobody’s side

Never be the first to believe

Never be the last to deceive

Nobody’s on nobody’s side

And never leave a moment too soon

Never waste a hot afternoon

Nobody’s on nobody’s side

Never stay a minute too long

Don’t forget the best will go wrong

Nobody’s on nobody’s side.

Better learn to go it alone

Recognize you’re out on your own.

Nobody’s on nobody’s side.

MOUNTAIN DUET

FLORENCE

This is the one situation I wanted most to avoid

Nothing I say will convince him this isn’t a trick.

THE RUSSIAN

A drink on a clear moonlit night–I relax, she smiles

There’s something unpleasant going on

FLORENCE

So with immaculate timing, I’m left to carry the can

Embarrassed, outnumbered, marrooned–

THE RUSSIAN

Now she can’t be working for them–I mean us–

She seems so very straightforward–

But where is he?

FLORENCE

He has to come back–he wanted this meeting, well didn’t he?

THE RUSSIAN

Maybe he’s scared–just as scared as he was in the game

FLORENCE

Oh I just couldn’t care less

He can go right ahead, go and wreck his career

I know I’ve done my best

THE RUSSIAN

Well, at least she’s a good looking spy.

FLORENCE

What if my Russian friend thinks that my plans

Are more of an intimate kind?

If I don’t say something and soon

He’ll go–maybe I’m on nobody’s side.

THE RUSSIAN

Listen, I hate to break up the mood

Get to the point, begin the beguine

Haven’t you noticed we’re a protaganist short

In this idyllic, well-produced scene?

FLORENCE

All I can say is moments ago

He was right here ready and waiting

THE RUSSIAN

Never mind him–I haven’t missed him so far

BOTH

Maybe it won’t do any harm

To struggle on without his charm?

Funny how all at once I feel

That he can go jump off the mountain I won’t care

FLORENCE

This is the one situation I wanted most to avoid

THE RUSSIAN

My dear opponent–I really can’t imagine why

FLORENCE

So I am not dangerous then?

What a shame!

THE RUSSIAN

Oh you’re not dangerous–who could think that of you?

BOTH

You–you are so strange–why can’t you be what you ought to be?

You should be scheming, intriguing, too clever by half–

THE RUSSIAN

I have to hand it to you

For you’ve managed to make me forget why I ever agreed to this farce.

BOTH

I don’t know why I can’t think of anything

I would rather do

Than be wasting my time

On mountains with you

FLORENCE QUITS

THE AMERICAN

So you got what you want

What a nasty ambition!

Set me up, pull me down

Then exploit my condition

I should have guessed, woman

That if pressed, woman

You’re on nobody’s side but your own

And you’re behaving

Like a mere woman

It’s so clear, woman–

It’s your sex!

Once they start getting old and getting worried

They let fly, take it out

On the one who supports them–

That’s you I’m talking about

THE AMERICAN AND FLORENCE

Who’d ever think it?

Such a squalid little ending

Watching you descending

Just as far as you can go

I’m learning things I didn’t want to know

Who’d ever guess it?

This would be the situation–

One more observation–

How’d we ever get this far

Before you showed me what you really are?

FLORENCE

You’ll be lost without me

To abuse like you’re used to

THE AMERICAN

Go away!

Just get out!

Be someone else’s parasite!

(But she has already gone)

I’m not the kind to be vindictive

Holding some childish grudge

How could I be? I’m in the spotlight

Half of the world my judge

All I demand is those I work for

Those I give all my skills and pain

Those that I entertain

Give me the same compassion in return

But the fools never learn!

EMBASSY LAMENT

CIVIL SERVANTS

Oh my dear how boring

He’s defecting

Just like all the others

He’s expecting

Us to be impressed with what he’s done here

But he

Hasn’t stopped to think about the paperwork

His gesture causes.

We’ve an embassy to run here

If these people blows for freedom

With a valid visa

We don’t need ’em

If we seem offhand then please remember

This is nothing very special

He’s the fourth we’ve had since last November

Who do these foreign chappies think they are?

And when he’s safely in the West

He’ll be the hero to discuss

The media will lionize him

Fame and fortune plus

No one will recall it’s

Thanks to us

(To THE RUSSIAN)

Have you an appointment

With the consul?

If you don’t we know what his

Reponse’ll

Be, he will not see you, with respect it

Buggers up his very taxing schedule

Pushing peace and understanding

Let us hope this won’t affect it

Far too many jokers cross the border

Not a single document

In order

Russia must be empty

Though we’re all for

Basic human rights it makes you wonder

What they built the Berlin Wall for

Who do these foreign chappies think they are?

And when you’ve filled in all the forms

And been passed clear of all disease

Debriefed debugged dedrugged disarmed

And disinfected please

Don’t forget the guys

Who cut your keys

ANTHEM

ANATOLY

No man, no madness

Though their sad powers may prevail

Can posess, conquer, my country’s heart

They rise to fail.

She is eternal.

Long before nation’s lines were drawn.

When no flags flew

When no armies stood

My land was born.

And you ask me why I love her

Through wars, death and despair

She is the constant

We who don’t care

And you ask me will I leave her–But how?

I cross over borders but I’m still there now.

(Musical interlude)

How can I leave her?

Where would I start?

Let man’s petty nations tear themselves apart

My land’s only borders lie around my heart

Act Two   |   Back to Chess Index