The Beautiful Game
All:
Measure your life in football seasons
Feel the passion and feel the heat
Football is the only reason
God Almighty gave us feet
Goal!
Buy the ref a flippin’ guide dog
Do you call that a bleedin’ pass?
Kick it out mate, what a ball hog
Dozy wanker, shift your arse!
Two-nil!
You dirty bastard
We’ll have the last word
Boys:
Come and have a go, have some of that
You think you’re hard but we know you’re crap
All:
Let’s have another, just like the other
Come on!
Boys:
Viva the beautiful game
Raise your voice for the people’s sport
All:
Long live the bountiful game
Those who play, those who support
Sick as a parrot, over the moon
Score a couple more for
A wonderful game, a magical game
Thank God for football!
Girls:
They’re our lads and we support them
Come on then, stick one in this time
All:
It isn’t a religion it’s more important
Sacred, holy and divine
Three-nil!
Boys:
Nice one, United
We’re all delighted
Girls:
No joy tonight, forget it again
My boyfriend’s in love with eleven men
All:
All sing together, comrades forever
Up yours!
Viva the beautiful game
It’s what Saturdays are for
Ooh! Ah! The triumph and pain
Work to live but live to score
We’re on our way now, to Wembley
Up for the cup, it’s
The classical game, the marvellous game
Thank God for football!
It’s an obsession, the reason we’re here
Cos it’s better than sex and it’s better than beer
So viva the emerald team
Mother Mary’s Irish sons
Viva the boys in green
Shout for Ireland’s youngest guns
Green is the colour, soccer the game
Score a thousand more for
The boys in green, the emerald team
Playing for Ireland
Playing for Ireland!
Clean The Kit
John:
Soon I’m gonna be a man, be a player not a fan
Cos that’s all I’ve ever wanted since my life began
Gonna be a soccer star, maybe drive a fancy car
Build a mansion in the country for my Ma and Pa
Gotta clean the kit
I’m so sick of it
Each day I have to go to school, have to try and keep my cool
While I study for exams in how to be a fool
It’s no wonder I’m annoyed, cos the state is overjoyed
Just to teach a poor boy how to join the unemployed
I’m so sick of it
School and cleaning kit
One day I won’t have to take it
Cos I know I’m gonna make it
All I need’s a chance and I’ll be on my way
Only fools obey the rules
They work all day like stupid mules
I’m busting out of here, I’ll do it one fine day
I ain’t eating shit
Cleaning people’s kit
Thomas & Cronies:
You’re not fit to wear our kit, you bastard orange proddy git
We’ll tear it off your back and stuff it down your throat
Take our advice or pay the price, we certainly won’t warn you twice
The tide has turned and soon we’ll be the ones to gloat
You’re a sodding Brit
Wearing Irish kit!
Mary:
So you’re gonna be a man, not a stupid also-ran
Now I’ve heard a lot of talk about your master plan
I don’t think you’ll be a star, you ain’t gonna go that far
You’re all talk and sod all action, you’re all blah, blah, blah
Come to terms with it
Born to clean the kit
Your life’s a farce, get off your arse
Take my advice, get back in class
Or hang around and moan and groan your life away
Cos every hunk ends up a drunk
Just killing time, his prospects sunk
Still claiming that he’s gonna bust out one fine day
If the cap’ll fit
You’ll be wearing it
Stuck here cleaning kit
John:
Have no fear, the time is near
This boy is busting out of here
I’ll be burning brightly once the flame is lit
I’ll make my mark, light up the dark
Explosions start with just one spark
Then another lad will have to clean my kit
I’m so sick of it
School and cleaning kit
Mary:
You’re so full of it!
John:
But one day I’m not gonna take it!
Don’t Like You
Mary:
Don’t like you, don’t like you
I don’t think I like you
You’re bad, you’re sad
And I know nicer boys
John:
Not bothered, not bothered
I simply am not bothered
You’re vain – a total pain
And I know sweeter girls
You’ve been hanging round my door and watching me at school
Mary:
Yes, and I was thinking you’re completely uncool
John:
Well, I wouldn’t say yourself was much to shout about
Mary:
Do your fly up, sonny, cos your brain’s hanging out
John:
You’re gagging for a date I know you’re dying to meet
Mary:
I don’t think so, why there’s still a dog left out in the street
Both:
That’s fine by me, I don’t like you
Mary:
Don’t need you, don’t want you
I can live without you
I swear, I just don’t care
Because I know nicer boys
John:
Don’t like you, don’t need you
I don’t care about you
You see, you’re not for me
I like lots of other girls
Mary:
You bug me and you’re ugly and your jokes are a bore
Your efforts at coherent conversation are poor
The lights are clearly on but then there’s nobody home
John:
In that case, why the hell d’you call me up on the phone?
Mary:
I never flippin’ did, sure it was you who called me
John:
Well, what the hell, at least there’s one thing that we agree
Both:
I’m damn sure I don’t like you
(dialogue section)
John:
Don’t hate you, could stand you
If pushed, could tolerate you
Mary:
I’m sure that you’ll mature
I have known more stupid boys
You say it
John:
No, you say it
Mary:
All right – I vaguely like you
It’s bad, I must be mad
But I think we could be friends
John:
No commitment, only friends
Mary:
I like you
John:
I like you
Both:
Yes – I think I like you
It’s real, it’s how I feel
And I want…
God’s Own Country
Mary:
Where we live is God’s own country
Though it’s dirtier and poorer than He planned
Broken windows, broken lives
Jobless husbands, weeping wives
It may not look like God’s own country
But God is love and I know He loves this land
Though it’s ragged and it’s worn
It’s the place where I was born
The beauty lies within in God’s own country
It sleeps beneath the soil and ‘neath the sand
It’s our mothers and fathers, our heroes and martyrs
For God’s in the people and people are the land
Each new generation will rebuild the nation
That’s how it’s been since our history began
Protestant Girl:
In the darkness of the night I hear it singing
The whispering of the wind and rain, its song
Both:
A sublime eternal tune to the rhythms of the moon
These ancient chords were formed in the beginning
And they sing to me, “My country, right or wrong”
These are the songs we always sang
No one knows where they began
Mary:
This fair land is God’s own country
And it’s Catholic and Republican and free
Protestant Girl:
It’s a Protestant land made by God’s perfect hand
And a Protestant country it will always be
Both:
For Ireland is mine and is so for all time
From the Atlantic Ocean unto the Irish Sea
Where I live is God’s own country
I was born here and this land belongs to me
It’s in our blood and in our bones
It’s the place that we call home
The beauty lies within in God’s own country
It sleeps beneath the soil and ‘neath the sand
It’s our mothers and fathers, our heroes and martyrs
For God’s in the people and people are the land
Each new generation will rebuild the nation
That’s how it’s been since our history began
Where I live is God’s own country
Though it’s dirtier and poorer than He planned
Though it’s ragged and it’s worn
It’s the place where I was born
Let Us Love In Peace
Christine:
Dream about a day when we’ll be
Calm, serene, completely carefree
Just for fun, think of one ordinary day
Ask yourself what it would feel like
Dream the dream with all of your might
Close your eyes, visualise – just one normal day
Both:
Time to find out who we are
Time to find our lucky star
Time for all our pain to cease
We’ll love in peace
Del:
Just imagine no more violence
No more bombs, the sound of silence
Time to be you and me, time to love in peace
Both:
Days of hope so calm and tranquil
Private moments to be thankful
On our own, left alone – free to love in peace
Del:
Time to simply sit and breathe
Christine:
Time to learn how to believe
Both:
And give thanks for our release
To love in peace
Christine:
Time to dance and time to grow
Del:
Time to learn and time to know
Both:
Time to prosper and increase
Make love in peace
Sometimes I get on my knees and pray
For that one ordinary day
When all the pain will finally cease
Then we’ll be free to love in peace
Del:
Just for fun
Christine:
Think of one
Both:
Ordinary day
The Final (A Game Of Two Halves)
Us:
This is it, what a blast, in the final at last
We’re a dream of a team, we’re just totally excited
What a thrill, twenty-nil, we’ll go in for the kill
On a roll for a goal we could take on Man United
Them:
Try a pass, shift your arse, come on show us some class
Get stuck in, play to win ’til the very final minute
Knock it back, then attack, come on lads it’s a crack
If in doubt, kick it out ‘cos we’re really going to win it
John:
Oh what a lovely little move I would say
This boy has not got a lot to prove on the day
Must be on some sort of potion
He doesn’t need any other men, what a run
Let’s take a look at that move again, just for fun
This time let’s watch in slow motion
Boys:
Oh what a lovely little move I would say
This boy has not got a lot to prove on the day
Must be on some sort of potion
We’re the team that rocks
We’re the dog’s bollocks
Bernadette:
Ginger’s got the ball! Come on, Ginger!
Father O’Donnell:
Give ’em your snarl, lad!
Crowd:
You fat bastard, you’re rubbish
You ginger git, look his gut’s double size
What a useless tub, what a lard arse
Christ, now we know who ate all of the pies
He goes in for the kill and he makes it one-nil
What a fabulous goal, it enraptures the soul
The boy’s magic
Father O’Donnell:
My God this looks tense
They’ve got past our defence
Slide in low, on the toe, get stuck in, have a go
Risk a booking
Bring him down on the ground, don’t just piddle around
Chance your luck, chop him up
You can see that the ref’s not looking
Thomas:
I clearly played straight for the ball, did you see?
That dozy prat took a fall right in front of me
Any sane ref would agree it
Ref:
Out comes the book and a red card, off you go
You like to think that you’re so dead hard, now you know
They get a direct free kick
All:
Take the hero’s role
Score the winning goal!
Boys:
Green is the colour, Soccer the game
Score a thousand more for
The boys in green, the emerald team
We’re bloody magic
Just fucking magic
Off To The Party/The Craic
All:
Let’s get legless
Let’s get hammered
Let’s get ratfaced
Let’s get arseholed
We’re just totally great
There is no debate
I’m telling you mate
We’re the business
We are simply superb
Haven’t you heard
Divinely preferred
God’s our witness
We are stunningly skilled
Testosterone filled
We went out and killed
We’re fantasmic
We’re a magical team
We play like a dream
We’re clearly the cream
We’re orgasmic
Let’s get roaring punch drunk
Fighting, dancing, puke drunk
Hurling, belching, blind drunk
So drunk it’s obscene
Comatosely dead drunk
Unconscious on the floor drunk
An arseholed and hammered and totally shitfaced team
Violently ill drunk
Stretched out in the street drunk
Need a stomach pump drunk
Drunk as fifty men
Utterly insane drunk
Pickling your brain drunk
And when we recover, get bloody drunk again!
Are you up for the craic?
Do you know how to party?
Here’s the plan of attack
Give me a drink and start me
Are you quite sure that you’ve got the stomach for it?
Once the craic’s started there’s no way to ignore it
Free your wild side and let it all out, don’t fear it
Don’t just dance with your feet, dance with your very spirit
We’re all on for the craic
Everyone’s made their minds up
There’ll be no looking back
Nobody shouting time’s up
We’re all up for the craic
Partying’s what we’re made for
Don’t be boring or slack
Dance ’til it makes your feet sore
We won’t stop now that it’s really getting going
What the night promises there’s no way of knowing
Girl, boy, boy, girl – we can lose our inhibitions
Dance close, hold tight, come on really make some friction
We all live for the craic
Everyone’s on the dance floor
End up flat on your back
Good times have to be paid for
We all live for the craic
Everyone’s on the dance floor
End up flat on your back
Good times have to be paid for
Don’t Like You (Reprise)
Ginger:
I was wondering if there’s any chance that you’d be my bird
Or if you want, I’ll bugger off, just give me the word
Bernadette:
Not at all, I’d really like to see you again
If you think it wouldn’t be too much of a pain
Ginger:
Bloody hell, it’s taken me a year to ask this
Bernadette:
If that’s the case, why don’t we celebrate with a kiss
Both:
‘Cos I’m quite sure that I like you
Ginger:
I like you
Bernadette:
I like you
Both:
Oh dear, I think I love you
It’s strange, but things have changed
‘Cos now I’ve found my boy/girl
Our Kind Of Love
Christine:
Our kind of love
Our kind of passion
Burns with a heat so hard to bear
It’s not a game
No fad or fashion
Our kind of love’s for those who dare
I must be strong
I must be bolder
Cling to my dream and never tire
Each love denied
Leaves people colder
New love rekindles every fire
I shan’t betray my heart’s desire
Even though we come from different sides
We won’t hide
I am in love
No one can blame me
Such is my story and my fate
My kind of love
Will never shame me
My love is stronger than their hate
My love is stronger than their hate
I shall cling to him with all my might
It’s my right
All kinds of love
Bring us together
Causes the broken heart to mend
People must love, now and forever
There’s only one love in the end
There’s only one love in the end
Let Us Love In Peace (Reprise)
Bernadette:
Just imagine no more violence
No more bombs, the sound of silence
Time to be young and free
Time to love in peace
Days of hope so calm and tranquil
Private moments to be thankful
On our own, left alone
Free to love in peace
Bernadette, Mary, Christine:
Time to simply sit and breathe
Time to learn how to believe
And give thanks for our release
To love in peace
Bernadette:
Time to dance and time to grow
Time to learn and time to know
Time to prosper and increase
Make love in peace
Bernadette, Mary, Christine:
Sometimes I get on my knees and pray for that one ordinary day
Bernadette:
Then we’ll be free
To love in peace
Father O’Donnell:
We are gathered here today to give thanks for the life of Gregory O’Shaugnessy. He would have been eighteen next week.
All:
Sometimes I get on my knees and pray for that one ordinary day
When all our pain will finally cease
And we’ll be free
To love in peace